Questions

Fold'em is an app that blocks gambling. Someone installs it on their own iPhone, chooses a length of time, and the gambling apps and betting sites on that phone stop opening for the whole of it.

The part that matters is what happens next. Once it is running, they cannot simply turn it off. Ending it early takes an ask, an answer from someone they chose in advance, and a wait of at least 72 hours after that. Deleting the app does not end a term either.

People choose it because willpower is unreliable at exactly the wrong moment, and this moves the decision to a calmer one. It is a commitment device, not a treatment service and not a monitoring tool: we do not watch anyone, and nothing here is medical advice.

Almost always, one thing. If the person you hold for asks to end their term early, you get an email and you answer it.

There is one other case, and it is rare: if they want to hand the key to somebody else, that change needs your approval too. Nothing else is asked of you, and nothing is asked at all unless one of those two happens.

Someone wants to hand you their key. You have 24 hours to accept or decline. If you do nothing, the request expires and nothing changes: the current keyholder keeps the role.

Accepting does not switch the key over right away. The current keyholder still holds full authority, including keeping the lock on any exit request, until the handover takes effect a day later. You only become the keyholder of record once that day arrives.

Once you hold the key, everything else on this page about being a keyholder applies to you.

Eleven things, and this is all of them.

1. Their first name. Never their full name.
2. Whether protection is on, and which status word the pass is carrying.
3. How far through the term they are, and the end date when the term has one.
4. A count of blocked attempts, and a note when that count runs higher than usual.
5. Milestone days they reached, and a term they extended with its new end date.
6. Whether an early exit request is open, and a note when they withdraw one.
7. Which alert categories they muted, by name.
8. A lapsed subscription, and the date protection would end if renewal stays off.
9. The app deletion lock turned off or kept, and which of three reasons they gave: freeing up space, changing phones, or other.
10. A handover: that one is running, the first name of the person taking over, and the date it takes effect.
11. A notice if they close their account, if they stop having a keyholder, or if they remove you.

You never see which apps or sites were involved, anything they browse, any amount of money, or anything they typed. There is no spend figure anywhere in what the server sends a partner, so there is nothing for a page or a pass to accidentally show you.

It is the main thing you hold. It updates itself, it banners your lock screen when something turns, and an early exit request opens from it. You were emailed one when you accepted.

You do not strictly need it: the same status lives on your web link, and every consequential alert also reaches you by email. But the pass is the surface that tells you the moment something changes, without you going to look.

The pass updates itself as things change, but that update travels as a push notification, and push is best effort. It can arrive late, or not at all, if the phone is offline, the network is slow, or Wallet has not synced in a while.

A calm looking card is not proof that everything is calm. If it has been a long time since anything changed, or you are relying on it for something urgent, open the pass to force a refresh, check your web link, or reach out to them directly. The glossary above tells you what each word means when it is current. It does not tell you how current it is.

It marks how far into their milestones they have come. It fills in as they reach each one, and once it reaches full it stays full, even if the term carries on much longer afterward. A full moon with nothing new happening is normal, not stuck.

You can keep the lock, from anywhere, in one tap. That is the whole remote decision, and it is the easy one on purpose.

You cannot let them out remotely at all. Not from the web page, not from the pass, not by replying to the email. Letting someone out only happens face to face: they scan the code on your Wallet pass, in person, in the Fold'em app on their phone. There is no button anywhere that stands in for standing together.

If you keep the lock, they are told kindly, with no reasons given, and they can ask again after two days.

Doing nothing ends the same way, seven days later. An unanswered request is approved on its own, and that is deliberate, not an oversight. See What happens if I do nothing? below for the whole rule.

After seven days with no answer from you, the request is approved automatically. No button gets pressed, but the outcome is the same as if you had approved it yourself.

This is deliberate, not a gap in the system. The role exists so somebody is asked, not so somebody can quietly avoid answering. Being unsure, being busy, or wanting to talk to them first does not pause the clock. Not deciding is itself a decision, and it is the decision that lets them out.

If you want time to think without letting the clock run out, keeping the lock is not final: they can ask again after two days, and you can consider it again then.

Nothing unlocks that day. A wait of at least 72 hours starts, and it can be as long as fourteen days if the key changed hands recently. Only then does the protection end.

During that wait, only they can call it off. You cannot take an approval back, and support cannot shorten it or extend it. If you have second thoughts, the person to talk to is them.

No, and that is deliberate. Which alerts go out is the user's setting, in their own app, not yours. There is no toggle on any page or pass for you.

The part you always keep: if they change what you are told, that change is itself reported, and nobody can switch that report off. It reaches you on the Wallet pass rather than by email, so the pass is where you would notice it.

No. You are a witness, not a guard, and no blocker is absolute. The whole value of the role is that someone who is not the person gambling knows what is happening. Steadiness matters more here than vigilance.

You hold no key, and no exit request will ever reach you. There is nothing for you to approve or to keep.

You see less, and it is items 1 to 5 and 7 of the list above: their first name, the status word, the term progress and end date, the blocked attempt count and its busy note, milestone days and an extended term, and which alert categories are muted. You do not see an exit request, the app deletion lock, a handover, or a lapsed subscription's end date, and you have no web page of your own.

Fold'em emails you twice at most: once if you are removed, and once if the account closes. Everything else reaches you on the pass or not at all.

Yes, from your status page, at any time. It is better to hand the key back than to hold it and not answer.

If you hold the key: they keep their protection and continue without a keyholder, and no early exit completes in under fourteen days. Your device confirms it is you before it happens, so a forwarded link cannot do it for you. You cannot take it back yourself afterwards: they would have to invite you again.

If you are a witness: you simply stop being listed. Nothing about their protection changes.

Ask the person you hold for to resend it from inside their Fold'em app. Links are tied to the address they nominated, so nothing can be sent to a new address by asking us. That is what stops a lost link becoming someone else's key.

Every Fold'em email comes from hello@foldem.app. Check spam and trash first, and on Gmail the Promotions tab, because that is where a first message from a new sender usually lands. Adding the address to your contacts stops it happening again.

If it is the six digit code you are waiting for: go back to the invite link you were sent and use Send it again, under the code boxes. Give the first one a minute before you ask for another.

If it is your pass or your link: ask the person you hold for to resend your access from inside their Fold'em app. We cannot send it to a different address than the one they nominated, and that is deliberate.